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final little push. I’ll be doing some work on my essay until probably 23rd, but interspersed with wa

final little push. I’ll be doing some work on my essay until probably 23rd, but interspersed with watching christmas films and going on dog walks, so fairly lowkey. fortunately the essay is super interesting + I’m so happy that this course has opened up so many different schools of thought and ways of reading in just one term! also extremely pleased with this table in my bedroom, now that my desk is gathering dust in my house for a couple of weeks. when I hurried back a couple of days ago, I did make it a priority to bring my laptop stand in my suitcase (people often ask - it’s this guy, and I couldn’t recommend it more! https://www.ikea.com/gb/en/p/braeda-laptop-support-bamboo-veneer-30384822/

hope everyone is safe, well + starting to wind down for the holidays. it’s been rough, and weird, recently and, really, all year, and the news is getting difficult to listen to again, but we’ve all pulled through and a bit of indulgence is certainly in order now! 


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i cannot even begin to emphasize how romantic signing off letters or postcards with “always yours” is. like… no one ever knows if they would be together forever. we love someone with the knowledge that they might not be in our lives in the future. we know we could fall apart. we still write “always yours”, because we mean to say, “hey, i know you might not be in my life forever, but you will have a part of me still. a part of me will be always yours to keep.” i need a moment

no one:


my brain every two seconds: yoOoOouRE IN THE HO OU S E AND IIIIII AM HEEEEERE IN ThE C AAA Aaa a a R CUZ IIII JUST NEEEED A QUIEeEt PLA A A A CE WHerE I CAN SCREEEEAM HOW I LoVe yOu-

no matter how loud you yell, fictional characters wont listen to you and that pisses me off quite a bit like god damn it will you just talk it through like stop walking the oTHER WAY-

i really need to stop dropping things and picking up new things on accident because i just saw a book under my bed and went “oh yeah im annotating that-” like i havent touched it in months.

This is the nineteen “last straw” apparently. Can you use a different phrase next time? If you’re so unhappy with my life choices, stop giving me second chances and just leave.

i really want to get up and go out and do things like go to the library and go get coffee with my friends but i for the life of me can’t get out of bED-

welcome to part 23529 of romanticizing every aspect of my life so I don’t fall into a deep depression: i listened to chloe moriondo and made rice and thought ‘this is it this is life’ like who the fuck does that

to the convince store worker that looked at me with worry as i put four monster energy drinks and sugar free mint gum on the counter, im fine im just not fine <3

there’s this boy with really pretty hair that i, for lack of a tamer word, am infatuated with. am i gonna do anything about it? absolutely fucking not-

“Here it goes again

The worst side of me

I’ve kept under my skin

Makes me feel uneasy deep inside

I couldn’t love myself properly

There was a part in me that was Unnecessary and far away

From my ideal self

And I broke it by force.”

- 댐인

I’m annotating ‘Call Me By Your Name’ by André Aciman after reading it twice and I got to the scene where Elio keeps changing the way he played the piece and making Oliver frustrated and it took ALL OF MY WILL POWER to not cover the whole scene in highlighter. It’s one of my favourite parts in the whole thing.

Me: I love learning and studying and working. I am only complete when I read and annotate books for fun and write essays on obscure topics.

My 59 missing assignments: wanna work on us then?

Me: no <3

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